The city pool & polio…

Life

I find city pools, public pools, water parks, pretty much any artificially created body of water teeming with germs to be literally the most vile thing in existence. I cannot believe that I am reading reports about these facilities re-opening in some locales. Luckily, I’m allergic to chlorine and have had very few encounters with any pools. There are a handful of films set in the late 50’s-1970’s that so romanticized the city pool that I really felt like I was missing out on something. I’ve been to pools, mostly to lay out and read but I’ve never experienced the elation of diving into a packed pool on a 90 degree day. The city that I work for actually had 2 public pools that were filled in and turfed over back in the 40’s and I never knew why. Last night, I was watching a documentary on polio – I mean, who hasn’t watched every documentary on modern pandemics since this has all started? During the polio pandemic, pools and movie theaters were closed each summer for four decades. FORTY YEARS. So it makes sense that films and television shows depict going to the pool as peak childhood ecstasy. There probably wasn’t a lot to do as a kid back then and they were deprived of two main sources of entertainment for decades. Can you imagine the feeling of being able to safely sit in a movie theater in July post the discovery of a vaccine? It must have been mind blowing. Not only that, parents wouldn’t allow kids to play on playgrounds or go to birthday parties. FOR FORTY YEARS. Kids went from school to polio season, sounds like a fucking nightmare. And people just did it because they understood what they were doing was for the greater good. Fast forward 70’ish years later and people could not stay off the playgrounds for literally FOUR WEEKS.

Is COVID-19 the same as polio? No. Is there really any comparison when you consider the symptoms and long-term impacts in addition to the fatality of polio? Perhaps not but people are still dying. I think that’s reason enough for people complaining about not being able to get a haircut to shut up. What happened to people? When did we become these egocentric assholes who can’t even put on a mask to protect someone else? So a haircut or nail appointment is delayed, who cares. I don’t see a lot of people protesting and holding up signs saying that they need heart surgery or some other important service that has been tabled due to COVID (even though I know that they are out there). We are a society in which very few people have experienced real hardship and it shows. It’s truly unfortunate that instead of coming together for the long haul, we have people getting shot over face masks, purposely coughing on one another, protesting at hospitals. Elon Musk, talking out his ass. Like, come on – we are losing a war on germs over fucking haircuts.

I know that people are out there doing good too and all we can do is keep trying to take care of one another πŸ’™

β€œHard times create strong men. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. And, weak men create hard times.” G. Michael Hopf

It’s Monday

Life

I’m neither for or against Mondays on the whole, I don’t find them anymore more trying that any other day of the week but today was an exception. It started at 5 AM…

Scholastica Regular

It rained all weekend, last night I noticed that there was water coming through my spare room ceiling. I wouldn’t have noticed it had there not been a lovely pool of water on the carpet. I texted the building manager who said that the roofers were starting this week and he would take a look in the morning. At 5 AM, he texts me telling me to move my car because the workers were going to be using the parking lot. Had I been more alert, I would have realized that this made no sense because I park in the garage but I peeled out of there anyway less than half awake. I run into the building manager in the parking lot who told me he wanted me to move my car into the garage. That’s where it was. He had my car confused with another black car and told me to move my car back. Then he asks me if I’ve been smelling smoked meats in the building lately.Β What the fuck are you talking about. No, I hadn’t noticed but apparently someone complained that people have been grilling on their decks. I’ve never noticed but nothing would shock me at this point. I get the car parked, get back inside and decided to lay on the couch until I had to start work. 7 AM rolls around, the roof work commences, someone starts screaming at the roofers to shut up. Not just once, not like twice, like a dozen times. Yea, 7 AM is a tad early but we all knew this was happening and it’s only for the week anyway. People have really lost their minds. I’ll keep you posted on the smoked meats situation.Β 

Scholastica Regular

I work in the public sector & have been getting a lot of feedback from both sides of the spectrum on how the government is handling the corona situation. Today, my inbox was full of vandalism reports. For a state that’s supposed to have been on a Stay at Home Order, people sure stopped keeping an eye on their kids. I don’t care that they are bored, itΒ  would serve everyone right if we did have to stay inside all summer. Also, penises are such unimaginative ‘graffiti’ like, raise your kids better.Β 

Scholastica Regular

It was such a weird morning, I zoned out for half an hour and showed up late to a conference call. I’m not sure that anyone noticed but I felt like a moron. In the middle of this meeting I get a text asking if I’m still getting rid of my couch. Again, what the fuck are you talking about. I had posted my couch for free on Craigslist aΒ longΒ time ago but had since resolved to not get a new one. I must have not taken the posting down and after years of waffling back and forth on getting a new one, finally have the opportunity. It’s not a bad couch, it’s just old and clunky and has definitely seen better years. Do I keep it? Do I finally get rid of it especially now since I have someone interested in taking it?! Being a single female, I don’t even like owning a couch because they are such a pain to move. Maybe I’ll go really nuts, get rid of the couch and just cover the living room in floor pillows. Side note, how is it that I could comfortably take a nap on the floor as a kid and now it’s literally the worst thing ever?

Scholastica Regular

I’m only half-way through the day and am exhausted. I don’t think the roofers will knock off until sundown but they aren’tΒ that loud anyway. Once a flock of geese landed on the roof and they made considerably more racket. I’ve had a Pepsi and two pour-over coffees but I could lay down for 3-hour nap literally right now.Β 

How’s your Monday so far? Anything fun on the agenda for Memorial Day…oh, that’s right – summer is cancelled. I hope you’re doing the best you can wherever you are πŸ’›

Apprehension…

Life

The Minnesota Stay at Home Order was set to expire Monday and the Governor announced that he would in fact not be extending the order through May as originally predicted. Bars, salons and restaurants must remain closed until June 1 but most other retailers are allowed to reopen. This is it, right? What we’ve all been waiting for. But now that it’s here, I’m not so sure. I think the human race learned a hard lesson here, Mother Nature can bring us to our knees in a matter of weeks and she doesn’t give a fuck about the economy. Are we just supposed to go back to business as usual, pretend that the way we live our lives isn’t completely unsustainable? I think we figured out real quick that it’s not just average people living paycheck to paycheck – it’s landlords, corporations, small businesses, big businesses, universities and the government. The people who are supposed to have this all figured out and provide security to the common man have no ability to do so at all. I don’t believe we are in the clear, I think the future holds a lifetime of uncertainty. Not just about what will happen with the virus or the next pandemic but job security as well. Obviously, the days of retiring from a lifetime career with a cushy pension are long over, Hell, I think my grandparents were the last generation to retire comfortably. Now we see people working well into their 60’s and often taking part-time jobs to supplement their social security benefits. I have no delusions that I will ever retire and am planning on social security being bankrupt by the time I am eligible, the government can’t just keep printing money. I also don’t believe that UBI is a good idea either, citizens shouldn’t have to depend on government for our livelihoods – we should be able to make our own way and they seem to want to make that more impossible each and every day. Squeezing out small farmers with ridiculous regulations, squeezing out small businesses by mandating minimum wage and health benefits – they’ve made it very difficult for anyone who is not ultra-wealthy to be successful in their own enterprise and it’s scary. A society that is completely dependent on their government has no freedom.

I think this is a wake up call, it wouldn’t be wise to go back to how things were. We need to become self-sustainable, self-dependent and self-reliant. For me, Monday won’t be back to business as usual – it will be hoarding my assets now more than ever so that I can get out of this cycle of working for someone else so that I can have money to spend on stuff I don’t need only to the benefit of those who don’t need more money. I thought that I had learned this lesson after the 2008 Recession and yet, here I am. My only post-pandemic plan is freedom πŸ’›

The old normal wasn’t normal…

Life

Hearing that more businesses within the service industry are being given the green light to reopen elates me but also gives me pause. I’m glad that more folks can get back to work but also concerned about the risk they are being put at. If you’ve worked in the retail or service industry in America then you know that calling in sick for work is frowned upon. I’ve work(ed) for three major retailers and while I rarely called in sick or missed shifts, I know firsthand what it feels like to get guilt-tripped into going in for a shift while sick. It’s scary how normal this is, I waited tables for a restaurant in Minneapolis whose policy was if you didn’t have a fever or diarrhea then you should be at work. This culture runs deep within the service industry and I think we can all agree that this is not acceptable any longer (nor was it ever).

Unfortunately, for those of us who grew up working service jobs, this mentality stuck with us. At my former corporate office job, we wouldn’t take sick days but would work from home instead. It’s not unusual for people to be in the office coughing and sniffling at work during flu season, even at my current workplace. It’s bizarre to me that staying home when you aren’t feeling well has to be so stressed, this is what we should have all been doing in the first place. Employers should be required to offer sick time to all employees from their first date of employment. It took me 3-years to start accruing PTO while working for JCPenney and I think I started at .89 hours. That means it would have taken me 16 weeks to accrue ONE paid day off. One. After 3-years, I could request a day off while working for a huge corporation. Funny thing is, I graduated college shortly thereafter having never taken a day off and they had to cut me a check for 2 hours of PTO when I left that job πŸ˜€ Now, the obvious argument is that if you want a better benefits package then you should get a better job. I think that all of the people who live by that mantra have figured out how much they depend on these ‘low-skill’ workers and I hope that their mindset has changed.

I am thankful that I have a good job now with better than average paid time off and an awesome boss who would never make me feel guilty for being gone. Even now though, over 10 years into my career, I still feel guilty about taking a sick day. I often check my email and voicemail even if I am at home sick even though there isn’t any pressure from my boss to do so.

As someone who is trying to be a more conscientious consumer, it’s past time to start holding companies accountable for how they treat their employees. Minimum wage workers are an integral part of the huge profits these corporations make each year & should be treated as such. If a company can’t afford to pay their employees reasonable benefits then they should cease to exist (looking at you JCPenney). I’ve been watching very closely what corporations have been doing to safeguard their employees well-being through all of this and there are some that I will definitely not be giving my hard earned cash to any longer. I think it’s the least I can do to support those who are expected to do so much for so little 🀍

Damned if you do, double damned if you don’t

Life

Much to my surprise I found myself at the grocery store this weekend. Prior to this whole pandemic, I rarely went into grocery stores and almost totally depended on grocery pick-up because I just hate grocery shopping. Actually, I used to only do Coborn’s delivery but they stopped delivering to my area about a year ago so I switched to pick-up. Unfortunately, now that so many other consumers are also using pick-up, it’s become a complete nightmare. There’s a three-day wait time at Wal-Mart and Target in my area with some of the smaller chains experiencing even longer delays. I get it, their volume exploded and they are just trying to make it happen. I’ve been shopping for enough food to last me 3-weeks or longer if needed just in anticipation of this. I rolled up to get my order like you do on Saturday, there were 4 other cars waiting and two associates were talking to one guest. It seemed like there was some confusion as she was picking up multiple orders for Door Dash which wasn’t a good sign. I waited probably 20 minutes or so, not unusual, for an associate to come to my car. During that wait time, I received an email thanking me for picking up my order. Uh-oh. When the associate came to my window they said that my order had already been picked up, I explained that I had just arrived and hadn’t picked up my order. They went back inside to double check that my stuff wasn’t sitting somewhere and the notification had just been sent by mistake. No such luck, another associate came out and reiterated that my order had been picked up. I explained that I hadn’t picked up my order. To which her response was, well it’s been picked up. No apology, no explanation of what I was supposed to do now just – your order was picked up. My order in total was right under $300 and she wasn’t providing any explanation of how this happened, what I was supposed to do, etc. I ended up just calling the customer service number and was issued a refund that I should see in 5-7 days.

The whole thing just got me thinking though, it wasn’t a huge deal for me financially as I was able to just go into the store and purchase what I needed (what was in stock, that is) but what if I didn’t have the ability to do that? What if I had just spent all of my money on food and would have to wait for the refund? What if I was out of food? What if I had kids at home? It really irked me, maybe if I had made a fuss then I would have at least been given an apology but maybe not. From now on, I will be going into the store and doing my own shopping. I’ve been trying to avoid doing so but don’t really see another option given what happened this weekend. Maybe I won’t always have the money in my account to cover SIX WEEKS of grocery shopping since I was effectively out that amount of money. Which brings me to my next gripe, people not wearing face masks in public.

Why is this so hard, America? You couldn’t stay home when told and now that we are being allowed to get out more, you can’t just cover your fucking face? JUST DO IT. Nobody likes wearing them, they make your face sweat, rub on your ears and make it harder to breath but this is not an infringement on anyone’s civil liberties and I am tired of hearing that it is. If the government suddenly mandated that everyone wiped their ass would people just stop doing it?! That’s how stupid these people sound to me. Also, if you aren’t going to wear one then you don’t get to heckle people who are or harass store associates who tell you to wear one or walk around being a general asshole. This mentality of thinking it’s OK to infringe on someone else’s freedom as long as they don’t infringe on yours is such hypocritical bullshit and I’m sick of it.

Honestly, what a shit weekend and I am glad that it’s over even if that means today is Monday πŸ˜› Hope you are just doing the best you can wherever you are πŸ–€

Saturday Vibes: Feeling Completely Unmotivated

Life, Random

It’s Saturday, it’s a beautiful sunny day & I’m completely unmotivated to do anything. I’ve cleaned everything, I’ve organized everything, I think my neighbors below me will make a complaint if I vacuum one more time. I skipped my bed time skincare routine last night (accidentally) & decided to just do it this morning and lay around all day. Then I got bored and decided to clean something, I already cleared out and organized my bathroom drawers but my makeup bag has become a bit of a monster:

IMG_20200425_132746

Clearly, a remedy to this issue would have been to buy a smaller bag but I have wanted this bag for ages, I just couldn’t drop $21 on it. I spotted this neon beauty at the drugstore around Christmas, it was on clearance for $12 and was packed with a bunch of Soap & Glory products. I gifted the products to a friend and kept this giant, gloriously neon bag for myself. It needs a good clean out though, here’s a peek at everything as well as what is staying or going.

{Avocado Creamy}

{Avocado Creamy}

Charlotte Tilbury Pressed Powder: I have to use this one up but that’s the only reason that it gets to stay in the bag. I don’t like it, it doesn’t set my makeup and makes my skin look dry.

Charlotte Tilbury Magic Away Concealer: Out, I can’t use these. I think they are only meant to be worn underneath the eye but the formula irritates my eyes, plus they are really old and the sponge tip applicator stinks.

MAC Soft & Gentle: This is a keeper, I’ve almost panned it anyway. I love the mineralized skin finish powders, they make the skin look so juicy and radiant but they’re powders. It’s witchcraft.

shape tape: Still my favorite concealer, even with dry skin I find that these give me the best coverage.

MISSHA BB Cream: Love this, it’s the only ‘foundation’ that I reach for during the summer. It packs a pretty good amount of coverage for a BB cream, it’s packed with SPF and blends seamlessly.

Bare Minerals foundation stick: These will stay, I have to use them up & only one of them has been opened. I purchased a ton of bare minerals foundation when it was on sale earlier this year. I paid around $10 for each of these after my discount. I like this foundation but the color isn’t a great match for me.

Honest Beauty Powder & Primer: Out, I purchased these as ULTA right before they closed and I don’t like either product. The powder is too yellow and drying, it also has a weird scent to it. The primer looks and works fine but it breaks me out.

Maybelline FitMe Loose Powder: Out, this used to be a long time fave but I find it to be too drying as of late.

MAC Powder Foundation: I should really use this up, unfortunately I bought this online and it pulls too yellow for me but it’s a great product otherwise.

TooFaced Concealer: This product did me dirty, I like the coverage and the formula but it’s so yellow! I didn’t notice until I was on a Zoom call & was shocked to see what a poor match it was. These are really old anyway so I’m tossing them out.

Coty Airspun: Out for now but it’s a good powder, I never bake with it, I take a blending eyeshadow brush and press it into areas where my foundation settles in fine lines. I wear lighter foundation in the warmer seasons and don’t have an issue with fine lines so I want be taking this extra step.

Bare Minerals BarePro Foundation: Again, I have multiples of this because it was on sale. It’s out for now but will go back to using it in the fall/winter. This is the .5 shade which is a much better match for me, the stick doesn’t come in this shade but I hope they release it soon.

{Avocado Creamy}

{Avocado Creamy}

Flower Beauty Blush Bomb: In, these are awesome.

Charlotte Tilbury Glowgasm: Out but mostly because it dried up, it’s a good product but there are other liquid blushes that I would recommend first for much cheaper.

Burt’s Bees Blush: I think this is Toasted Cinnamon, I plan to use this one up. The formula is not very long wearing but the color is really nice.

Bare Minerals Highlighter: In, definitely one of my most used products as of late.

Benefit Boxes o’ Blushes: These are all in, they are my summer cocktail for faux sun-kissed skin.

{Avocado Creamy}

{Avocado Creamy}

Colourpop Mascara: Out, it’s brown and just does nothing for my lashes.

Buxom: Out, it’s expired and has been irritating my eyes. I used to love this one but it’s not as good as I recall…

Smashbox Primer: In but would not repurchase, it has a spiky brush that I always manage to stab myself in the eyes with it. I like how it primes and conditions my lashes but the brush is torture.

Smashbox Super Fan: Out, it’s dried up and again with that spiky brush. It’s a fine mascara, nothing to rave about.

Lashtopia: This is my favorite right now, it’s volumizing and lengthening plus it conditions the lashes really well. I have about 4 back ups of this one, again they were on sale earlier this year.

{Avocado Creamy}

{Avocado Creamy}

UD Primer Potion: In, this is the only eye primer that I plan to use. I think it does what an eye primer should, why do there need to be more?

Charlotte Tilbury Eyeliner: This is out, expired but it was a good eyeliner. I’ve stopped wearing eyeliner for the most part, I’ve switched it up to just darkening the lash line with powder.

ABH Eye Primer: This is too wet and has as much coverage as a concealer. I received this sample with a purchase from Beautylish, I didn’t love it.

Colourpop Coco-nuts Palette: Honestly the only eyeshadow that I’ve been using & only two shades out of the whole palette at that πŸ˜› It’s an awesome, everyday neutral palette.

{Avocado Creamy}

tatcha Serum Stick: In, I use this under my eyes and around my mouth as part of my AM skincare routine. It adds just a bit of hydration in areas that dry out over the day.

Mamonde Lip Mask: In, I use this in the same way as the serum stick if my face is feeling especially dry. It’s also nice to put a little on after washing my face in the evening if I’m not doing my nighttime routine right away.

That’s everything that was in the bag! It looks much better now and I can store it under the sink as I had intended to when I first purchased it. What’s your makeup bag like? Do you do a little bag or giant one? Have you just about cleaned & organized everything in your life as I have πŸ˜‰ I hope that you are having a beautiful day 🀍

Friday Thoughts…

Life

Fair warning, I will mostly be complaining in this post so if you are feeling down or particularly joyful – maybe skip this one πŸ™‚

Buttey Honey Regular

Not that I loved working for the weekend but Friday doesn’t feel like Friday anymore. Working from home makes almost everyday feel like Friday because pre-Corona, that would have been a Friday luxury. Since every day feels like Friday, the next day always feels like Monday. I’m in this weird Friday/Monday time warp where it’s Monday morning then Friday evening every monkey flying day. It’s exhausting.

snakes

Buttey Honey Regular

Unprecedented, novel, uncertain, tumultuous, new normal – these phrases and numerous others must be stricken from the lexicon. We get it, many of us have never experienced something like this in our lifetime, we don’t need a reminder. Also, new normal? Do we remember what the old normal was like? Aside from the pandemic, the world was pretty much a shambles. I mean, at least a plus side to the pandemic is that it’s so traumatic that it’s taking our minds off of the current events that were were current events pre-corona. I’m going to stop saying pre-corona now πŸ˜‰

Buttey Honey Regular

My place of work has started very preliminary discussions around what going back to work will look like, mostly because our shelter in place order expires on May 4 & the assumption is that some restrictions will be lifted. Plexiglass shields and temperature checkpoints are some of the precautions being discussed. All I can say is that I hope that the antibody testing becomes widely accessible because I think I already had corona.

Buttey Honey Regular

In mid-December I became extremely sick with a respiratory illness that I ended up being sent to the ER for (I needed additional testing, not admitted or anything). They didn’t know what I had, I was sent home with steroids, an inhaler, an antibiotic and saw a respiratory therapist for a month for nebulizer treatments. I was sick for weeks & had complications with lung inflammation for even longer. I have pleurisy in my right lung that causes pain when I’m running or working out still. It was chalked up to a case of pneumonia but now I’m wondering, if corona has been in the US for longer than experts knew then some of us have likely already been sick. Better believe I am getting that antibody test as soon as I can. It would be nice to know so that I can start my MS treatment again which has been stalled since mid-March and indefinitely since the medication I take is immunosuppressive.

Buttey Honey Regular

I do believe that each day that we get through is another day closer to this new normal and that makes me feel a little less anxious. I still have a job, I’m starting my urban garden and Amazon donated 250,000 euro (is that what it’s called still) to a bookstore charity. Some days I feel like everything is going to be alright & other days I feel like nothing will ever be the same. Perhaps it won’t, being a natural introvert who loves being at home, even I have felt a yearning to take a trip or wander through a mall window shopping. I cannot imagine what people who do these things on the regular are feeling. As soon as the travel bans are lifted, I’m getting my passport renewed and I’m going somewhere. I mean, maybe just to Idaho but I’m going.

I hope that you are making it through the days, stay safe wherever you are πŸ’›